Wednesday, November 18, 2009

frustrated and upset

My trial right now is Cub Scouts. At first I thought the hard part would be getting familiar with all the awards, ranks and advancements. Since I obviously have never participated in Scouts before, that part has been difficult to sort out. Regardless, I have plowed through and am getting a better understanding each week. The problem is not the ceremonies, or even the boys. I have a great group, and although it was supposed to be a joint calling, my other half is usually too busy to help out much. Nope, I pulled off a good pack meeting tonight, singlehandedly. With a lot of work and preparation, I had all the achievements ready to award, a fun game, song and cheers. The boys participated and had a good time. My struggle isn't even with the parents. Most of the boys have good, supportive parents who help them achieve their goals.

My problem is the administrative part. I recently completed my first purchase of awards for a pack meeting. Having been asked previously to limit my spending from the budget, I have been just paying out-of-pocket for the few supplies and snacks necessary. To my surprise, I spent over $82 on awards! Chagrined, and hoping to be reimbursed, I submitted my FIRST receipt for these symbols of my boys' achievements and hard work, only to be rebuffed and chastised for spending any money!!

Now, may I ask, what else could I have done? Not purchased the awards my Scouts have earned? Paid for them by myself like I have been doing for everything else? Waited a few months before turning in my one and only request for reimbursement?

I think it highly unfair that I was put in this position to feel guilty about spending money on something that is normal and necessary.

Does it make me a bad person to want to feel some appreciation every once in a while? Or at least more guidance as to what I should be doing?

Maybe I just take things too personally.